The Cabaret

So the previous post was my drunk pink party post cabaret rantings. I get that way when I drink apparently. Contemplative Khiem. Yay...

So the cabaret went a lot better than I could have thought. To be honest, I was worried about all the different mistakes I would be making and not being comfortable on the stage, etc. Turns out most of those worried were for naught.

So my final set list:
Nothing in Common by Jason Robert Brown

Larger Than Life from My Favorite Year

Giants in the Sky from Into the Woods

I'll Be Here from The Wild Party

Heroes from 3 Guys Naked from the Waist Down

The Butterfly from The Story of My Life.

I couldn't have asked for a better reception to my set. Granted it was very intimidating to go up there and just wing the transitions. But after a time I loosened up and just had fun with it.

What really helped me were some affirmations that I read before going on stage that stated things like getting rid of need to please people and etc. I just decided that I was doing this for me and my enjoyment and the audience was merely along for the ride.

Okay, so I kinda have ideas as to what people really liked in the set. Larger Than Life was very well received. It is more an acting song and that fit really well for me. I was thinking about putting that as the ending song, and use my best song earlier in case I lost the audience at that point. But I chose to stick with my original order which just fit well.

The best received song was The Butterfly. I have been obsessing about this song for the longest time. I think I even have an entry in this blog that talks about it a little. I don't know. Something just clicked that night with that song. Darwyn was on, I felt the story, and my nervousness and worries just disappeared. I don't think I even realized the audience was there during that performance. It was a great experience. And I got a standing ovation after that too which was completely unexpected.

It's a great way to end my gaslight career for awhile. Med school is gonna take precedence and hopefully in another year I'll be able to come back for another set. Gonna be hard to top this though.

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Post-Cabaret

There are times when I realize that another step is about to happen. I know that I love the people that I am around. But the problem is now wondering how my relationships with them will turn out as the future progresses. If you didn't get to see my cabaret performance, I had a set that centered around growing up. It was really meaningful to me because the evening was not only about the songs that I was singing and entertaining the audience and doing something that I love, but it was also a step in the direction of growing up. I don't get to have that outlet that often, and to be able to express myself in that way was such an amazing experience. But now that it is over, I am realizing that real life still continues. And it is now time to realize that regardless of what I want, I have to grow up. It may not be a revelation of importance to most, but it is still a huge step in my life that I am still trying to come to grips with. And for one who hates veering from the status quo, I don't like change. I don't like knowing that it will be nearly impossible to see some of my friends for a long period of time. To know that some I may never see again. To know that some that I hold on to so closely will distance because of life. And I know that life is like that. We all must grow up. We all will lose friends that we have come close with. And I hate that. I know that it is easier now that there is things like facebook and networking of the like to keep in touch with friends, but distance and life still kill so many friendships that it hurts. It really does. So as I am sitting down at a party, I would like to thank everybody in my life for their friendship. I know that your kindness and love have helped push me along in my life, and I wouldn't be where I am now without you all. And I know I am not good at holding on to connections. And I am awkward sometimes at these these things. But regardless of where in life I knew you, I love you all and wish you everything in life. Because every one of you helped me become the person I am now. And I am so grateful and blessed for knowing each and everyone of you.

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